- Safeway accuses couple of shoplifting over $400,000 of groceries every year for 12 years . . . I just want to know how they were hiding everything. That's a lot of Cup O' Noodles up the bum.
- 28% of Americans say we have too many HOLIDAYS. This just in: 28% of Americans are crazy.
- You can actually estimate how much SEX a person will have based on their first name. Surprisingly "Jubal" isn't on this list . . . that must be because I'm off the chart!
- A lady calls the news to report that her mom's picture was POSTED on peopleofwalmart.com and ends up drawing twice the attention. That's pretty embarrassing, so much so that she might have to drive her house to another city.
- Food trays at the MALL are just as dirty as gas station toilets, AND Panda Express tastes just as delicious off of both.
- Can this guy teach me how to Dougie?
(Image courtesy of micah9. Used under Creative Commons.)