- Tiger Woods is going to SKIP the U.S. Open. Apparently he's got better things to do . . . no idea what their names are though.
- Quadriplegics can now STEER their cars by using their tongue rings. In a related story, quadriplegics are also looking a lot sluttier!
- A city in Connecticut had to shut down a new fountain because people kept using it as a BATHROOM. Personally I don't see a problem with it . . . feces is probably just as clean as the pennies people throw in fountains.
- This lady should really get Triple A. She couldn't find her car so she decided to go about it the old fashioned way . . . by starting a BRUSH FIRE to attract attention (???). No, that's not a joke. I'm going to assume she's not the sharpest tool in the shed.
- You can buy EVERY EMAIL Sarah Palin sent as governor of Alaska for $725.97. OR you can really challenge your reading skills by purchasing a Dr. Seuss book for $15 bucks.
Jubal -- 6/8/2011