- Researchers have found that the smell of lavender and pumpkin pie drives MEN WILD. Especially if that man is New Jersey Governor Chris Christie.
- Hostess and its striking union have agreed to MEDIATION efforts which will avoid the immediate liquidation of its products. In other words that $400 you spent on a box of Twinkies? Great financial decision.
- A new poll finds that, due to financial stress, 45% of people would RATHER SKIP the holiday season all together. The other 35% would rather skip it due to having to be around family members.
- Scientists have discovered a NEW SMELL called "oldfactory white". It's very similar to "oldmoney white" . . . which is just basically Mitt Romney's body odor.
- According to experts, Americans will WASTE over 200 million pounds of turkey this Thanksgiving. In other words, suck it Africa!
(Image Courtesy: massdistraction. Creative Commons)