- According to research, TV remotes and light switches are the GERMIEST places in hotel rooms. Sweet, I thought it would be the questionable streetwalkers I hired to sleep with me in them. That's a relief!
- Microsoft has unveiled a new TABLET called the "Surface" . . . although they should've called it, "5 Years Too Late."
- Roger Clemens was found NOT GUILTY of perjury in his steroids case. He celebrated by hugging his family . . . and then chugging a huge glass of HGH.
- A Cincinnati man was ARRESTED for having sex with a stuffed bear in public. Oh great, first gay marriage and now this? When is America just going to let us live?!
- There's a new language-learning website for people to learn Mandarin, Chinese where the instructors DRESS UP in scantily clad outfits and pose for the camera while teaching you the language. I tried it, it didn't give me a better understanding of Mandarin . . . but it did give me a major chaffing problem.
VIDEO: The most epic Slip-N-Slide you'll ever see
(Image Courtesy: Bob B. Brown. Creative Commons)