- Five people were ACCIDENTALLY SHOT at gun shows over the weekend. The people are currently in the hospital recovering from an overdose of irony.
- An Atlanta Falcons fan STABBED a 49ers fan in the throat after they lost the NFC championship game. Your move Raiders fans, your move.
- Today is MARTIN LUTHER KING day. Or as Mel Gibson calls it, Monday.
- Manti Te'o is going to do an INTERVIEW with Katie Couric. He's so excited about the interview he asked his make believe girlfriend to DVR it for him.
- A new survey reveals that 33% of women prefer a man in a SUIT. I say that's total crap . . . the other day I dressed up in a gorilla suit and chased chicks around the grocery store and all I got was escorted out.
(Image Courtesy: Mr. Thomas. Creative Commons)