- According to a new poll "THE PERFECT MAN" for women is a non-smoking, athletic male who went to college and makes over six figures per year. Whatever, I know that all girls really want is a guy that's super good at Halo.
- Arrests were made when a rivalry between two methadone clinics in Texas ESCALATED into arson and a murder-for-hire plot. Weird, normally heroin addicts are such level headed people.
- There's a new series of "Star Wars" COMICS that's supposed to expand the trilogy. Shhhh, you hear that? Off in the distance? That's the sound of nerds everywhere climaxing.
- Boston has declared a flu EMERGENCY. Mostly because doctors in Boston don't recommend flu shots, they recommend Irish whiskey shots.
- A Seattle woman has vowed to eat ONLY STARBUCKS for a year. I give her six months before she's wearing a size Venti.
(Image Courtesy: NeezyGFX Photography. Creative Commons)