Jubal News (08/23/12)

• According to a new report, Americans THROW OUT 40% of their food.  Unless of course their driver's license reads, "Jessica Simpson."

• A referee for the U.S. Open has been arrested on charges of KILLING her husband with a coffee cup.  In her defense though she DID say nonfat milk.

• Organizers of the Republican National Convention in Tampa are WORRIED about Hurricane Isaac.  Not that Issac might hit the coast during the convention, but that he might want to marry his boyfriend.

• Ikea is going to build an entire VILLAGE near Hamburg, Germany.  And yes, after constructing it there will be three random screws left over.

• President Obama has been BREWING his own beer at the White House.  Sources say it tastes like hoppy, full-bodied, disappointment.

(Image Courtesy: tomcensani. Creative Commons)