- A guy who STOLE a truck containing President Obama's teleprompter has been sentenced to 7 years in prison. Sources say he'll pass the time by delivering several long-winded speeches.
- A Louisiana company had to RECALL 468-thousand pounds of tainted beef. Speaking of tainted meat, what has Charlie Sheen been up to these days?
- A two headed pig has been BORN in China . . . and somehow it's already running for office in the United States.
- Tiger Woods came up SHORT at the Masters. That sentence was designed to be a "choose your own punchline" joke. Enjoy.
- There's a new DATING SITE that only allows men that are well-endowed. You can read more about it on "websites I will never be a member of dot com".
(Image Courtesy: jurvetson. Creative Commons)